A young husband comes home one night, and his wife throws her arms around his neck: "Darling, I have great news: I'm a month overdue. I think we're going to have a baby! The doctor gave me a test today, but until we find out...
Jokes
Last week, we took some friends to a new restaurant called "Steve's Place," and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It.
Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, "Esther, I'd like to ride in that helicopter." Esther always replied, "I.
A Jewish father was concerned about his son, who was about a year away from his Bar Mitzvah but was sorely lacking in his knowledge of the Jewish faith.To remedy this, he sent his son to Israel to experience his heritage. A year later, the...
A honeymooning couple was passing through Louisiana. When they were approaching Lafayette, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town. They argued back and forth until they got to.
Forrest Gump died and went to heaven. When he got to the Pearly Gates Saint Peter told him that new rules were in effect due to the advances in education.
A guy comes home completely drunk one night. He lurches through the door and is met by his scowling wife, who is most definitely not happy. "Where the hell have you been all night?" she demands. "At this fantastic new bar," he says. "The Golden...
A guy walked into a pro shop with a gorilla. "Is anyone interested in a little wager?" he said, flashing some large bills around. "I've got $500 here that says.
Through the pitch-black night, the captain sees a light dead ahead on a collision course with his ship. He sends a signal: “Change your course 10 degree east.”The light signals.
When Albert Einstein was making the rounds of the speaker’s circuit, he usually found himself eagerly longing to get back to his laboratory work. One night as they were driving to yet another rubber-chicken dinner, Einstein mentioned to his chauffeur (a man who somewhat resembled...