Three weeks after her wedding day, Daphne called her mother. "Mom," she wailed "John and I had a dreadful fight!" "Calm down," said her mom, "it's not half as bad as you think. Every marriage has to have its first fight." "I know, I know!"...
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Facebook is telling me to ’reconnect’ with my brother...hmmm, I see him everyday
A drunk staggered down to hotel reception and demanded a change of room. He was so insistent that the receptionist was forced to call the manager. "What seems to be.
A guy and his wife were speeding down the interstate when a state cop pulls him over. The man says, "What's the problem officer? Officer: "You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone." Man: "No sir, I was going 65." Wife: "Oh Harry,...
A magician is very happy because he has got a job on the Titanic. So he gets on the ship, and that night he does his act in front hundreds.
A doctor says to his patient, I have bad news and worse news'. 'Oh dear, what's the bad news?' asks the patient. The doctor replies, 'You only have 24 hours.
The kids filed back into class Monday morning. They were very excited. Their weekend assignment was to sell something, then give a talk on productive salesmanship. Little Mary led off, "I sold girl scout cookies and I made $30," she said proudly, "my sales approach...
“It’s wildly irritating to have invented something as revolutionary as sarcasm, only to have it abused by amateurs.”
A man went to the Doctor and the doctor told him he had only 24 hours to live. He goes home to tell his wife and after they both had.
“My level of sarcasm has gotten to a point where I don’t even know if I am kidding anymore.”