A little girl was playing in the garden when she spied two spiders mating. "Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?" she asked. "They're mating," her father replied. "What do you call the spider on top, Daddy?" she asked. "That's a daddy long legs," her...
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Knock KnockWho's there?Chuck!Chuck who?Chuck in a sandwich for lunch!
Q. What is the noisiest thing in the world? A. Two skeletons screwing on a tin roof.
Rejected Names For Ross Perot's Political Party 10. The Rosstafarians. 9. United We're Nuts. 8. The Dork-O-Crats. 7. Wacky Ass Billionaires. 6.The "You Might Be A Redneck If You Join This Party" Party. 5.The Adorable Miniature Candidate And His Friends. 4. Yankee Doodle Psychos. 3....
'WORDS OF WISDOM AT THE HALF CENTURY MARK' From the book, 'Dave Barry Turns 50' 1. The badness of a movie is directly proportional to the number of helicopters in.
The biggest fear of any computer user is that you just blew several grand on a clunker that's not even fit for a boat anchor. Try these dead giveaways on.
Marge was in bed with a man (not her husband). All of a sudden, they heard a noise downstairs. "Oh, my God, your husband is home! What am I going to do?" "Just stay in bed with me. He's probably so drunk; he isn�t going...
your momma is so fat, when she was in school she sat next to EVRYBODY!
Once, there were two parents taking a shower together, so then their two children (a boy, and a girl) come in the bathroom and the girl asks the mother, "Mom,.
A man & wife entered a dentist's office. The Wife said, "I want a tooth pulled. I don't want gas or Novocain because I'm in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible." You're a brave woman said the dentist. Now, Show...