In a recent contest, The Washington Post asked readers to dream up new elements for the Periodic Table. Among the best of the batch: Limbaughium Lb The heaviest known element. It possesses an ever-expanding mass. Very white. Acidic. Emits heat but no light. Instantly polarizes...
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Knock KnockWho's there?Tibet!Tibet who?Early Tibet and early to rise!
Q. Did you hear about the new all female delivery service? A. It's called UPMS - they deliver whenever the fuck they feel like it.
A guy with a black eye boards his plane bound for Pittsburgh and sits down in his seat. He notices immediately that the guy next to him has a black eye. He says to him, Hey this is a coincidence, we both have black eyes;...
Two nuns were asked by the Mother Superior to decorate the inside of the monastery, but under no cicumstances were they to get even one drop of paint on their.
What educational programs should the United States support to alleviate the burgeoning US-Japan trade imbalance? Japanese language lessons for lawyers.
A blonde called 911 to report a horrible accident. She was hysterical as she said, "robbery, robbery! they have stolen my dashboard, steering wheel, even my stick shift!" The police said they'd be right over. A few minutes later, the blonde called back, saying she...
As the crowded airliner is about to take off, the peace is shattered by a five-year-old boy who picks that moment to throw a wild temper tantrum. No matter what.
1. So your daughter's a hooker, and it spoiled your day. Look at the bright side, it's really good pay. 2. My tire was thumping, I thought it was flat..
Yo mama so fat they use the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping