When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90 % of their body... men are so polite they only look at the covered parts.
Top 3 situations that require witnesses: 1) Crimes 2) Accidents 3) Marriages Need I say more?
My friend claims that he "accidentally" glued himself to his autobiography, but I don't believe him. But that's his story, and he's sticking to it.
The other day, Nancy and I got into some petty argument. I say it was petty, she would have said it was Armageddon. As is our nature, neither of us.
What's worse than raining cats and dogs? Hailing Taxi.
The teenager lost a contact lens while playing basketball in his driveway. After a brief, fruitless search, he gave up. His mother took up the cause and within minutes she.
Sometimes, when I am matching socks, I think, "What if these two socks don't even like each other?"