It is very easy to become a superman, you just have to change the sequence of clothes while wearing.
Author: Joker#1
I'm pretending to be a hot girl on tinder so I can match with my roomate and tell him Im coming over so he'll clean the apartment.
I bet you $4,567.89 you can't guess how much I owe my bookie.
This year, my resolution was to read more so I put the subtitles on my tv.
How do you know if someone is hitchhiking or just complimenting your driving?
I'll be doing a book signing today at Barnes & Noble from 2pm until they kick me out for writing in random books.
My buddy set me up on a blind date and said, "Heads up, she's expecting a baby." Now I feel like an idiot sitting in the bar wearing just a diaper.
It's not peer pressure, it's just your turn.
So far eating hasn't filled the emptiness I feel inside, but I'm no quitter.
I know smoking is bad for me but my mama told me never to be a quitter.