Any room is a panic room if you've lost your phone in it.
Author: Joker#1
How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise MY hand!
Never tell a woman that her place is in the kitchen. That's where the knives are kept.
Being a hypochondriac is going to save my life one of these days
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic
The last airline I flew charged for everything. Except for the bad service. That was free.
My teenage angst has lasted 30 years.
Never break someone's heart because they have only one inside...break their bones because they have 206 of them.
"I ran a half marathon" sounds so much better than "I quit halfway through a marathon".
My internet is so slow, it's faster to just drive to the Google headquarters and ask them things in person.