Reported for Laughing
By A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus late at night. She noticed there was only a twenty something year old man on that bus. When she sat opposite him smiled at her. She immediately moved to another seat. This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again. That seemed to amuse him even more. When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing, she complained to the driver who pulled over and approached the young man.
“Why are you bothering this young pregnant lady?” he asked the young man.
The man replied, “Well sir, it was like this: When the lady got on the bus, I couldn’t help but notice her condition. She sat under a sweets poster that said, ‘The Double Mint Twins are Coming’ and I grinned. Then she moved and sat under a poster that said ‘Logan’s Liniment will reduce the swelling’ and I had to grin. Then she moved again and placed herself under a deodorant poster that said ‘William’s Big Stick Did the Trick’, and I could hardly contain myself. But sir, when she moved for the fourth time and sat under the poster that said ‘Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this accident’ I just lost it.”
The driver shook his head and proceeded with the route.
A farmed sold his old mule to a neighbor. Not long afterwords the neighbor complained that the mule would not plow a straight row. The farmer explained that whenever he had that problem with the mule he would insert a rubber hose into the rectum of the mule and blow really hard. A few days later the farmer noticed that his neighbor was attempting to give the old mule the “treatment” without success. The farmer got out of his vehicle, walked over to his neighbor, removed the hose, turned it around, inserted into the mule’s rectum, blew really hard, and the mule plowed straight rows. His neighbor said, “I don’t know what I was doing wrong, but please explain why you turned that hose around.” The farmer replied, “You don’t think I was going to put my mouth on the same end of that hose that you had your mouth on do you?”