Cold Sergeant
By The Captain called the Sergeant in. “Sarge, I just got a telegram that Private Jones’ mother died yesterday. Better go tell him and send him in to see me.” So the Sergeant calls for his morning formation and lines up all the troops.
“Listen up, men,” says the Sergeant. “Johnson, report to the mess hall for KP. Smith, report to Personnel to sign some papers. The rest of you men report to the Motor Pool for maintenance. Oh by the way, Jones, your mother died, report to the commander.”
Later that day the Captain called the Sergeant into his office. “Hey, Sarge, that was a pretty cold way to inform Jones his mother died. Couldn’t you be a bit more tactful, next time?”
“Yes, sir,” answered the Sarge.
A few months later, the Captain called the Sergeant in again with, “Sarge, I just got a telegram that Private McGrath’s mother died. You’d better go tell him and send him in to see me. This time be more tactful.”
So the Sergeant calls for his morning formation. “Ok, men, fall in and listen up. Everybody with a mother, take two steps forward. Not so fast, McGrath!”
I went into the service in 1961. This was the first joke I heard in boot camp. In another morning formation, the sergeant said,”all those with driver’s licenses step forward 1 pace.” About 10 soldiers stepped forward. The sergeant said,” you 10 go see the QuarterMaster, sign out a push lawn mower, 1 each, and take up positions on the south lawn for driver’s test. From that day forward, whenever they said…take one step forward…no one moved .
That’s why you NEVER volunteer for anything in the military lol