Nobody ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public.
Sarcastic One-Liners
It’s okay if you don’t like me. Not everyone has good taste.
People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.
When someone says, ‘Expect the unexpected.” I slap them and say, ‘You didn’t expect that, did you?
They say women speak 20,000 words a day. I have a daughter who gets that done by breakfast.
Some days at work, I just wonder which level of hell is this?
When I’m feeling down and someone says “suck it up”, I get the urge to break their legs and say, “walk it off”.
You know that little voice inside your head that keeps you from saying things you shouldn’t? I don’t have that.
What I like the most about some people is their dogs.
People who reply to my sarcasm with sarcasm are my kind of people.