My loyalty cannot be bought. However, it can be rented.
Sarcastic One-Liners
I don’t always tolerate stupid people. But when I do, I’m probably at work.
I don’t sugar coat, I’m not Willy Wonka.
Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.
Don’t argue with fools, because from a distance other people can’t tell which one is you.
Sometimes, I look at my boss and I can't believe this is what we ended up with after 6 billion years of evolution.
Some people are just treasures that you just want to bury them.
You have no one to blame but yourself. Unless some other guy is standing next to you then you can blame him.
I hate it when I think I’m buying organic vegetables but when I get home, I discover they’re just regular donuts.
Only dead fish go with the flow.