Blonde Jokes
By One night a blonde nun was praying in her room when God appeared before her.
“My daughter, you have pleased me greatly. Your heart is full of love for your fellow creatures and your actions and prayers are always for the benefit of others. I have come to you, not only to thank and commend you, but to grant you anything you wish,” said God.
“Dear Heavenly Father, I am perfectly happy. I am doing what I love. I lack for nothing material since the Church supports me. I am content in all ways,” said the nun.
“There must be something you would have of me,” said God.
“Well, there is one thing,” she said.
“Just name it,” said God.
“It’s those blonde jokes. They are so demeaning to blondes everywhere, not just to me. I would like for blonde jokes to stop.”
“Consider it done,” said God. “Blonde jokes shall be stricken from the minds of humans everywhere. But surely there is something that I could do just for you.”
“There is one thing. But it’s really small, and not worth your time,” said the nun.
“Name it. Please,” said God.
“It’s the M&M’s,” said the nun. “They’re so hard to peel.”
Ole and Sven decided they would go duck hunting, so they bought a duck dog and went out in their duck boat to the duck blind in Lake Wobegone. They stayed out there all day with ducks covering the skies all around them but at the end of the day they didn’t have one duck to bring home.
So Sven asked Ole “how come we don’t have even one duck to take home for the missus to cook?” And Oe calmly replied “Do you think we’re throwing the dog high enough?”