your mother so fat that when she puts her lip stick on she has to use a paint roller!
Author: wptangerine
What's the difference between a Mexican American Princess, and a Jewish American Princess? A Mexican American Princess has fake jewelry and real orgasms.
The Boy Who Wanted to Be a Truck Driver One day, a little boy goes into the candy shop and orders five pounds of "m-n-m's",. The lady at the counter.
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't want. A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets...
Did you hear about the teacher who was helping one of her kindergarten students put his boots on? He asked for help and she could see why. With her pulling.
No matter what happens, there is always somebody who knew that it would.
Q: Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back? A: From crawling across the street when the sign said "DON'T WALK".
This German guy wanted to marry this Polish lady, but Poland had a law that you have to be Polish in order to marry someone that is Polish, so, in.
Q:How do you make a Swiss roll? A:you push them down the Alps.
Q: Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? A: Because he didn't have any guts!!!