How many alt.conspiracy readers does it take…

How many alt.conspiracy readers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to do it, one to insist that the CIA was responsible for
the
old bulb burning out, one to blame it on the Illuminati, one to
blame
the TLC/CFR/Bilderberg group, Steve Crocker to say that Lyndon
LaRouche predicted the bulb would someday burn out whereas the
British-dominated establishment was telling us the bulbs would
never need to be replaced, Ted Frank to tell everyone they’re
full of it,
and several other people to insist that Ted is a member of the
CFR.