Home
Auction Parrot
One day a man went to an auction. While there, he bid on a parrot that was supposed to be able to talk. He really wanted this bird, so he got caught up in the bidding.
He kept on bidding, but kept getting outbid, so he bid higher and higher and higher. Finally, after he bid way more than he intended, he won the bid – the parrot was his at last!
As he was paying for the parrot, he said to the auctioneer, “I sure hope this parrot can talk. I would hate to have paid this much for it, only to find out that he can’t talk!”
“Don’t worry,” said the auctioneer, “He can talk. Who do you think kept bidding against you?”
Missing Husband
A wife went to the police station with her next-door neighbor to report that her husband was missing. The policeman asked for a description.
She said, “He’s 35 years old, 6 foot 4, has dark eyes, dark wavy hair, an athletic build, weighs 185 pounds, is soft-spoken, and is good to the children.”
The next-door neighbor protested, “Your husband is 5 foot 4, chubby, bald, has a big mouth, and is mean to your children.”
The wife replied, “Yes, but who wants HIM back?”
Why do I…
Why do I keep paying the bills? It just encourages them to send more.
Blind Date
How was your blind date?” a college student asked her roommate.
“Terrible!” the room-mate answered. “He showed up in his 1932 Rolls Royce.”
“Wow! That’s a very expensive car. What’s so bad about that?”
“He was the original owner.”