“It’s all fun and games until someone doesn’t pick up on the sarcasm.”
Sarcastic One-Liners
"Sometimes the amount of self-control it takes to not say what's on my mind is so immense, I need a nap afterward."
“Have no fear of perfection—you’ll never reach it.”
Always remember that you are absolutely unique... Just like everyone else...
"Everyone has the right to be stupid, but you are abusing the privilege."
“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.”
"A prisoner of war is a man who tries to kill you and fails, and then asks you not to kill him."
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
“When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they’re not it.”
"A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well-known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized."