Aliens

Two aliens came down to earth to do some research on humans and
to test out their new super weapon too. They land in a desert
and start walking down a dirt road.
They come up to a telephone pole, “Speak earthling or I will
shoot you,” says the alien. Now of course the phone pole
didn’t utter a word, so the alien shot it. Little peices of
wood flew everywhere. They then went on.
The aliens then came up to a mailbox. “Speak earthling or I’ll
shoot you,” says the alien again. Well the mailbox didn’t say a
word, so it got blasted to itty bitty pieces of metal. The
journey continued. This time the aliens came up to a gas pump.
“Speak earthling or I’ll shoot you,” said the alien. Now of
course the gas pump didn’t say a word, so the alien raised his
gun to fire. “Wait!” yelled his little alien buddy, “give this
one another chance.”
The alien decides that this is fair and tells the gas pump
again,” Speak earthling or I’ll shoot you.” And again the pump
says nothing.
So the alien shoots it, it erupts into a huge ball of flames and
hurles the aliens back to their spaceship.
Dazed, the alien asks his friend ,” How did you know not to
shoot that one?”
“Well,” he answers, ” I figure any earthling who can wrap his
dick around his body twice and then stick it in his ear must be
a bad son of a bitch!”