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Can I borrow $60
A husband and wife were having difficulty surviving financially so they decided that the wife should try prostitution as an extra source of income.
The husband drove her out to a popular corner and informed her he would be at the side of the building if she had any questions or problems.
A gentleman pulled up shortly after and asked her how much to go all the way. She told him to wait a minute and ran around the corner to ask her husband.
The husband told her to tell the client $100. She went back and informed the client at which he cried, “That’s too much!” He then asked, “How much for a handjob?” She asked him to wait a minute and ran to ask her husband how much.
The husband said “Ask for $40.” The woman ran back and informed the client. He felt that this was an agreeable price and began to remove his pants and underwear. Upon the removal of his clothing the woman noticed that the man was well hung.
She asked him once more to wait a moment. She ran around the corner again at which her husband asked “Now what?” The wife replied “Can I borrow $60?”
”When science finally……
“When science finally locates the center of the universe, some people will be surprised to learn they’re not it.”
My Dad’s a Lawyer
Two small boys, not yet old enough to be in school, were overheard talking at the zoo one day.
“My name is Billy. What’s yours?” asked the first boy.
“Tommy,” replied the second.
“My Daddy’s an accountant. What does your Daddy do for a living?” asked Billy.
Tommy replied, “My Daddy’s a lawyer.”
“Honest?” asked Billy.
“No, just the regular kind”, replied Tommy.
”A celebrity is a…..
“A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well-known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.”
50 Years
Well there was this couple who had been married for 50 years. They were
sitting at the breakfast table that morning and the old gentleman said to his
wife, “Just think honey, we’ve been married for 50 years.”
“Yeah,” she replied, “Just think, fifty years ago we were sitting here at this
breakfast table together.”
“I know,” the old man said. “We were probably sitting here as naked as
jaybirds fifty years ago.”
“Well,” Granny snickered,� What do you say…Should we?” Whereupon the two
stripped to the buff and sat down at the table.
“You know honey,” the little old lady breathlessly replied, “My nipples are as
hot for you as they were fifty years ago.”
“I wouldn’t be surprised,” replied Gramps, “One’s in your coffee and the other
one’s in your oatmeal.”