New College Courses for Men…
New College Courses for Men as Prepared by Women:
1… Combating Stupidity
2… You, Too, Can Do Housework
3… PMS: Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut
4… How to Fill an Ice Tray
5… We Do Not Want Sleazy Underthings for Christmas: Give us Money
6… Understanding the Female Response to Your Coming in Drunk at 4:00am
7… Wonderful Laundry Techniques (formerly titled “Don’t Wash my Silks”)
8… Parenting: No, It Doesn’t End With Conception
9… Get a Life: Learn to Cook
10… How Not to Act Like an Asshole When You’re Obviously Wrong
11… Spelling: Even You Can Get it Right
12… Understanding Your Financial Incompetence
13… You: The Weaker Sex
14… Reasons to Give Flowers
15. How to Stay Awake After Sex
16… Why it is Unacceptable to Relieve Yourself Anywhere but the Bathroom
17… Garbage: Getting it to the Curb
18… You Can Fall Asleep Without IT if You Really Try
19… The Morning Dilemma if IT’s awake: Take a Shower
20… I’ll Wear it if I Damn Well Please
21… How to Put the Toilet Lid Down (formerly titled “No, It’s Not a Bidet”)
22… “The Weekend” and “Sports” are Not Synonyms
23… Give Me a Break: Why We Know Your Excuses are Bullshit
24… How to Go Shopping with Your Mate and Not Get Lost
25… The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency
26… Romanticism: Ideas Other Than Sex
27… Helpful Postural Hints for Couch Potatoes
28… Mother-in-Laws: They are People Too
29… Male Bonding: Leaving Your Friends at Home
30… You, Too, Can Be a Designated Driver
31… Seeing the True You (formerly titled “No, You Don’t Look Like Brad Pitt When Naked”)
32… Changing Your Underwear: It Really Works
33… The Attainable Goal: Omitting TITS From Your Vocabulary
34… Fluffing the Blankets After Flatulating is Not Necessary
35… Techniques of Calling Home
36… Introductory Foreplay: The Drive Home Does Not Count.