Hard to Reach

A blonde is speaking to her psychiatrist. “I’m on the road a lot, and my clients are complaining that they can never reach me.”

Psychiatrist: “Don’t you have a phone in your car?”

Blonde: “That was a little too expensive, so I did the next best thing. I put a mailbox in my car.”

Psychiatrist: “Uh … How’s that working?”

Blonde: “Actually, I haven’t gotten any letters yet.”

Psychiatrist: “And why do you think that is?”

Blonde: “I figure it’s because when I’m driving around, my zip code keeps changing.”

Six Months to Live

A doctor tells his patient he’s got only six months to live. But the patient doesn’t pay his bill on time, so the doctor gives him another six months.

When Abe Was Your Age

When his son asked for a lift in his car just to get to the end of their road, his father told him: “You should be ashamed. When Abraham Lincoln was your age, he used to walk ten miles every day to get to school.”

“Really?” said the boy. “Well, when he was your age, he was a President!”

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