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New Interns
Two new young interns are hired in the White House.
They are walking down the hall when President Clinton sees them.
The President walks up and says, “Gee, I’ve never come across your faces before.”
Submitted by Curtis
Edited by BreeBrown
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is…
If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you.
Jockstrap Boys
A new look for the Backstreet Boys![[Image]](http://www.jokeindex.com/images/jockstrapboys.jpg)
Submitted by: JuliaNote: Our “Send this Joke to A Friend” email thingy doesn’t transmit pictures. But if you see this in email, you can click on the link above!
Best Bodypart
A man rented an apartment and went to the lobby to put his name on the mailbox. While there, an attractive young lady came out of an apartment next to the mailboxes wearing a robe. He smiled at her and she struck up a conversation. As they talked, her robe slipped open, and it was quite obvious that she has nothing on under the robe. He broke into a sweat trying to maintain eye contact.
After a few minutes, she placed her hand on his arm and said, “Let’s go in my apartment, I hear someone coming…”
He proceeded her into the apartment, and after she closed the door, she leaned against it allowing her robe to fall completely open. She purrred at him, “I saw you looking. What would you say is my best feature?”
He cleared his throat several times, looked her up and down and finally managed to squeak out, “Oh, it’s got to be your ears!”
She was astounded! “Why my ears? Looks at these boobs! They are full, don’t sag, and they’re all mine! My butt — it’s firm doesn’t sag, and has no cellulite! Look at this skin, no blemishes, or scars! Why in heaven’s name would you say my ears are the best part of my body?!”
Clearing his throat once again, he stammered, “Outside when you said you heard someone coming — THAT WAS ME!
Technological Doctor
One day, a man complained to his friend, “My elbow really hurts, guess I should see a doctor.”
His friend said, “Don’t do that. There’s a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor. Simply put in a sample of your urine, and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. And it only costs $10.00.”
The guy figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10.00. The computer started making some noise andvarious lights started flashing. After a brief pause, out popped a small slip of paper which read:
You have tennis elbow.
Soak your arm in warm water, avoid heavy labor.
It will be better in two weeks.
That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this computer could be fooled.
He decided to give it a try. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the computer, poured in thisample and deposited the $10.00. The machine again made the usual noises,flashedlights, and printed out the following analysis:
Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.
Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic.
Your wife is pregnant….twin girls. They aren’t yours. Get a lawyer.
And…. if you don’t stop jerking off, your elbow will never get better!
A BBS Commandment
14. Thou shalt first dial BBS numbers during the day by way of voice line to assure correct numbers.